Category Archives: Big Piece of Cake

Stolen Moment #1

I wasn’t kidding when I said I only had five minutes here and there to write these days… But I also wasn’t kidding when I said I’d post every day during the week until the Summer is over and I have some blocks of time to devote to something a bit more significant.

So here’s what I’ve got today.

Oliver had his second day of auditory processing therapy. He’s done really well with just leaving me in the waiting room without a backward glance and keeping his headphones on. I credit this to us having been there once before for the testing (when he wasn’t so keen on leaving me OR wearing headphones) and the home system that we’ve been using for the two months prior to in-office therapy.

Yesterday, I left the twins with a friend (my apologies Jenn) so that I’d be able to help transition Oliver as necessary. Since it wasn’t necessary, I felt much better about bringing the whole gang today. I won’t bore you with the picky details – but here are some highlights:

1. For two days in a row, Oliver has materialized in front of me at the end of his hour and twenty minutes brandishing a page of sticker that say “Diva” and “Drama Queen.” Since he’s not bothered by girl colors (even though green is his official favorite), he wore his purple and pink with pride.

2. George and Eleanor are desperate for their own “appointments.” Especially at this place with all of the cool OT gear. Tire swings apparently make a difficult childhood of developmental delays totally worth it.

3. Most importantly – I’ve really seen improvement in a short period of time doing the home listening program. I’ll write more about this another day since I find it fascinating (in the very little research, general idea way that I find things fascinating) – but the bottom line is that this is doing something, and we’ll take it!

Gotta run – I actually have plans to meet a couple of friends out for a drink. A luxury that life as a suburban housewife rarely offers me. So again – I’ll take it!

"What I Did This Summer…"

Now that summer vacation has arrived and I will officially have at least one child demanding my attention 24/7 (or until they go to bed and I then have Chris demanding my attention), I’m wondering when I will have solid blocks of time to write.

I mean the kind of writing that requires my full attention. Because I can grab five minutes here and there throughout the day… But I generally need a bit more than that to come up with the usual magic that happens here.

Kidding aside – how do you busy stay at home moms do it? It’s been almost a year since I left my full time job and you can really tell when you look at the post dates in my archives. Anyway – blah blah boring blah… I’m just thinking about what I can do save my blog from dying a slow death over the summer while I have my non-napper, Oliver home with me all day.

So I’m thinking of committing to writing something every day, Monday through Friday, all summer long. This would mean quick updates and anecdotes as opposed to the longer posts I tend to write. Who knows – maybe I’ll even get back to my little fiction project that stalls every few months.

Maybe that’s the ticket. A summer vacation for my blog. School is out and day camp starts today. I’ll trade in Math and English for Arts and Crafts (I don’t do sports as you know – so that kind of camp isn’t happening).

Are you feeling the same way? Want to join me in making some lanyards for the next couple of months?

Random Availability

So I really was meaning to write something here this week… But Netflix sent us a couple of Weeds DVDs and my evenings have been pretty booked up with that.

And I’m not even kidding.

I actually did have something half written – but in the heat of some manic organization, I accidentally deleted it. So I feel really incentivized by that…

Instead I’m going to do one of those “Random Tuesday” posts. Which is very much in keeping with my personal style since, you know – it’s Thursday.

Here are some doings and goings on from the past week or two.

Eleanor turned 16. Or at least she thinks so. The exasperated “oh MOM!” sighs from my three year old daughter are plentiful these days. But she’s also been delighting me by parroting my own overused turns of phrase. Sometimes they aren’t the most attractive of reflections:

Eleanor [downstairs]: Mom – can I have some water?

Me [upstairs]: Sure – but please come up here instead of yelling.

Eleanor [probably rolling her eyes since she’s impersonating a teenager]: But I’m watching TV…

Me: Well – I’m making dinner, so if you want it, you’ll have to come up.

Eleanor [stomping up the stairs]: OKAY! But I really don’t have time for this right now!

Nice work, mom…

But then she also does things like cup her hands on either side of my face, look me in the eyes and say, “you are my very special girl.” So I guess I can live with the rest.

George has been rather challenging lately. Which is to say he’s a very bad little boy. Lots of drawing on walls, destroying expensive blush with manicure tools, screaming for candy at 8:00 a.m… And he’s so intense – he literally loses his mind when he becomes agitated. I’ve mentioned before that he’s a screamer, and I don’t think I could ever fully convey through the the medium of written word exactly how piercing that sound is. I believe it’s one octave lower than the pitch of a dog whistle. The highest note audible to human ears. It’s not a good sound. So it’s not surprising that he has been led to believe that candy may be a breakfast option every now and again…

I worry about George.

But his “quirks” will have a little more time to develop while I focus all of my immediate attention on doing everything I can to prepare Oliver for Kindergarten. His IEP is DONE! And I’m fairly pleased with it. I didn’t get everything I asked for – but close. And at this point, I think he really needs to be there before I can decide if he needs more services.

And I have high hopes for additional progress over this summer since he’ll be doing a number of different things in the way of therapy. OT on Wednesdays, a social skills group on Fridays (hard to explain that one…play therapy?), and most exciting – auditory processing therapy. That last one is kind of controversial, but we’ve had him doing a home listening program that has already produced some pretty impressive results.

Initially, I thought I’d try to be very cautious about my expectations – to keep my hopes in check and just see how things go. But you know what? Fuck that. I’m going full tilt The Secret on this one. My feelings? So don’t matter. If any single shred of positive attitude can tilt the universe in favor of my son’s success – then I think I can handle whatever disappointment comes my way. I’m expecting a miracle. And I can actually do that, because I have a black belt in adapting to whatever garbage life throws me. I’ve been doing it for years, and I can do it again as necessary in September. Because I’m going to be thrilled with any results I see.

And then of course there is the abyss of “the Summer” looming. Tomorrow is the last day of preschool and I will no longer have that bus pick up to break up the day and give us some structure. I’m going to have to come up with a schedule of sorts (aside from Oliver’s Kindergarten boot camp training that is). So that’s a new project for me.

Fun things coming up include a trip to the West Coast to see Chris’ family the first week of July. We’ll be at the beach in California for half the time and will then drive to Phoenix to stay at my inlaws’ house. I haven’t been there since Oliver was a baby – so I’m really looking forward to it.

Then just a few weeks later, I’ll be going to BlogHer. I’m actually pretty excited for this since I’ve never been able to go before. And NYC is so close. It’s one of my favorite cities, so I’m hoping to work in a little time outside the conference hotel. So far – no big plans, but I’m starting to ask around about meeting up with various online friends. Will you be there? Let me know.

Oh – and I’m writing this on a new netbook since our computer is dying. Apparently “the motherboard is going.” I don’t know much about computers – but as a “mother” I thought this sounded rather ominous. Because we all know that “when the mama ain’t happy – ain’t nobody happy.” Or something like that.

Until we replace the computer, my posts may be rather photo-free. I have no idea how to access images from my new external hard drive. So far it looks like the netboook’s motherboard isn’t all that compatible with external hard drive. While the external hard drive is physically present, it seems impossible to retrieve any of the data. I’m starting to get a little frustrated…these aloof external hard drive types are so draining. No matter what I try, it just won’t let me in. Things aren’t looking good as my motherboard surely won’t stand for this kind of treatment. And all I want are some family pictures. A few fond memories to pop into an otherwise meaningless post. Apparently, this means nothing to the all take and no give external hard drive. At the moment, nothing is available to me. Emotionally unavailable external hard drives…they’re all the same.

Now that was just sad…I’m going to quit while I’m ahead (or only slightly behind). Since I can’t leave you with an uplifting image plucked from that daily miracle we call motherhood, you can just close your eyes picture three smiling faces, smudge free and without a trace of impending drama, trauma or tantrums. Also know that this doesn’t exist anywhere in the Hood family hard drive (external or not). But when given creative license, you may as well run with it.

Sound Byte: Raising a Star

Okay – I’ve got another one. As you may have guessed from my last post, Eleanor cracks me up.

Every time she throws another gem at me, I think, “I need to write this stuff down.”

So why not. I have only one post to show for myself this week (here, that is – I have plenty going on at Wishing True and Style Key West).

Anyway – here it is. When she’s not wearing dresses, Eleanor can also be found in summer pjs covered in stars. She loves them and calls them her “star pajamas.” She’s so creative…where does she come up with this stuff?!

Well the other morning while entrenched in some early a.m. mother torture, she was wearing her star pjs and doing a little water color painting. I came over to admire her work and commented that I loved her precise, linear style.

Her response? “Yeah – I’m a star.”

I love how my kids are at an age when humility or self deprecating protests are incomprehensible. I’ll cry when that ends…

So of course, I agreed, “yes – you are a star sweetie.”

She looked pleased with herself and elaborated, “uh huh – I’m a star in my pants.”

Dream big, baby – dream big.

Help Save the Gulf

As a lifelong Louisiana resident, my blogging friend, Lindsey of A GreatFull Day and The Bright Side Project feels a strong connection to the tragedy unfolding daily along the Gulf Coast.

In her own words:

“Generations of fishermen who are following the only trade their family has ever known are jobless. Innocent animals are swimming in the effects of our human error and meeting their demise. Our delicate marshes and waterways despite efforts are being flooded with oil and our native plants are faltering. The beaches lining the coast show signs of the spill as tarballs wash ashore. Each day and hour that passes makes the situation more dire and leaves the gulf coast (and the world) wondering just how much damage will be done. And we all are praying that a solution is found before hurricane season rears its head.”

So she’s decided to offer a photo print from her Etsy shop and donate 100% of the proceeds to the Audobon Society who is helping preserve wetlands, heal animals and clean up the mess.


Please help our coast by purchasing a print or donating directly to one of the organizations aiding in relief.

Lindsey – you have a good and generous heart. Much love to you.

The Shooting Range


As a parent of three small children in a townhouse community FULL of children, I’m only just starting to experience the anxiety of letting them play outside the safety of our front lawn. At one time, they would happily stay close to home and never considered crossing the street to interact with the older kids. But now that my oldest is five and my younger two are three, I suddenly find myself lapping our block and crossing into the next cul de sac to hunt down escapees.

They’re still a bit young to seriously join the roving gang of elementary schoolers on bikes and scooters. But when the games involve running through the woodsy common areas with plastic guns and gun-like sticks, the possibility for blending in with the crowd becomes more likely.

And as usual, my first concern is how my five year old with communication delays and all of the awkward social behaviors that accompany them will handle this. I worry that Oliver will opt to disengage and continue to play by himself in the dirt. I worry that he’ll try to play with the other kids but be rejected. I worry that he’ll manage to stay with the group but take their game too far and come across as aggressive.

There are so many things to worry about… So ultimately, I just don’t. I follow Oliver’s lead and try not to interfere. But when I see an opportunity to help him figure things out – I do make the effort.

So I recently bought some cheap dart guns from the grocery store. Then one quiet afternoon when the twins were napping and the other neighborhood kids were scarce, I set up a little shooting range for us. I showed Oliver how to cock, insert the dart, aim and pull the trigger. I, who have never expressed any interest in hunting, paintball, popular college “assassin” games or war movies, yet again had to push my own preferences aside to help my child be normal.

And what at thing to teach him! I mean – aren’t we supposed to discourage guns? Or at the very least, tolerate them within limits? I’ve never heard any experts suggesting that you teach your child to be the quickest draw on the block to help him fit in. But at the end of the day, I have little concern for my son’s future of wielding guns on clock towers or in convenience stores. I’m a bit more focused on him not getting pantsed in Kindergarten.

To be honest though, it doesn’t look like I have much to be worried about anyway. When I suggested that we turn our guns on each other (cringe), he didn’t much like that idea. My little pacifist! We compromised by shooting at our reflections in the windows. And a good time was had by all….sigh.

While I can’t say that I think he’ll be quite the gun fanatic that I see budding in his three year old brother, George…he does now have a clue about what to do if he encounters a pick up game of Armageddon with the guys.

I miss the days of watching Oliver toddle around. Of being oblivious to the future of special needs hurtling at us with a speed and force that would literally knock us flat. But you can’t look back. In fact, I’ve found that you can’t look that far into the future either.

It may sound short sighted to say that I’m not worried about the long term effects of encouraging what most parents consider “inappropriate toys,” all in the name of a short term goal to help him fit in. But just as I had no idea that my seemingly typical baby and then toddler would develop such complicated learning and social delays, how could I possibly predict the person he will eventually become? I personally think that he will be someone pretty wonderful. And a few unorthodox parenting strategies will not greatly impact the the bigger picture of his future as a law abiding citizen.

Like I said – he doesn’t seem to be all that gun crazy anyway. In general, he largely ignores the war games going on around him. But the other day while we were standing outside, he actually picked up a stick with the rudimentary shape of a gun and pointed it at one of our neighbors, a very enthusiastic war mongering six year old. He even made a little shooting noise.

I nearly burst with pride.

That same evening I witnessed something truly amazing. My Oliver, who has a hard time figuring out how to even be a follower with the neighborhood kids, actually took the lead.

Our next door neighbors have a cat named Tony. He’s a sweet black and white kitty who lounges around on various front steps and cars. He’s friendly and more importantly, extremely patient with the grasping and groping hands of the local tots.

Oliver loves this cat. He will lie down next to Tony on the sidewalk while petting him. He will follow him around when Tony tires of his advances and tries to leave. I’ve even found Oliver’s little feet sticking out from under our car where Tony had taken refuge (I can’t take my eye of those kids for a minute…) And there was no exception that evening when Tony came strolling around the corner. He was immediately attacked by my adoring son.

After a few minutes, Tony decided that it was time to extract himself from all of that suffocating love. And of course, when the poor cat darted away, Oliver followed. As luck would have it, this grabbed the attention of our six year old neighbor friend and another little boy who was standing nearby. They ran up to see what Oliver was doing.

Oliver just said, “want to go get Tony?” and out of nowhere, a wild chase ensued. Now joined by my twins, the three boys ran like crazy after poor Tony all around our side of the block. They chased him under back porches and crowed with delight when they saw him streak by in another attempt at escape. I would have been happy to just see Oliver joining in the game, but this time he was actually calling the shots, “this way!…there he is….get him!“

I have never been so thrilled to see children torturing an animal.

Okay – “torturing” is a rather gross exaggeration… But I think it’s safe to say that Tony would have preferred to spend that thirty minutes sunning himself in the last few rays of daylight.

Of course, none of the children actually hurt, let alone touched Tony. And he’s still fond of us, willing to let Oliver pet him for limited periods of time. But that evening, he was more than just the neighbors’ friendly cat. He was the catalyst for what would be the first time Oliver played with a group of children for that long without losing interest and wandering off. I almost cried to hear him say “follow me!” and then to actually see the other kids do just that.

So yeah – yet another example of allowing behavior that should probably be discouraged. I admit it – I make some iffy calls…but I generally stand behind my choices.

I don’t look too far ahead. It’s simply too much for me to take in. Too many unknowns. Too much worry…too much hope… Instead I try to aim for the more attainable goals in the here and now.

I don’t know much about shooting, but my guess is that you have to keep your range realistic. Anything can happen – sometimes the easiest target might give you the slip. But it goes without saying that you should take your chances when you’ve got a clear shot. One that’s close enough to touch. Even if it seems a bit risky. Life is always risky, so why not take our chances when the odds are in our favor. You take a risk every time you walk out your front door. Just ask Tony.

What Would Pioneer Woman Think?


I often think about how much easier my life as a mother has been made as the result of advancing technology. Need a quiet moment to make a school-related phone call? Put on a DVD. Prefer the kids to read instead of watch TV while you clean the kitchen? Pull out the Leap Frog Tag.

I don’t need to send my children outside to play unsupervised (remember those days when five year olds roamed the neighborhood solo?) just so I can find time for house cleaning and meal preparation. I have an arsenal of electronics at my disposal. Tasks that once took hours to do are now set into motion with the flick of a switch. No wonder we watched The Jetsons and really believed that one day, a full three course chicken dinner could be conjured up by pushing a few buttons on a box in the wall. I mean, I am from the generation that witnessed the dawn of microwave cooking. What wonders would follow?

So while I once dreamed of being Laura Ingalls Wilder and wearing long dresses with bonnets, playing in backyard creeks and hosting taffy pulls, I now shudder to think of cold basin baths, washboard laundering and cooking in giant pots over hearth fires. Pioneer living doesn’t sound like much fun to me as a mother in 2010.

And aside from fun, the real upshot of all of this is that we now have more time to devote to parenting our children. We give them chores to teach them responsibility, not because we require their help to run a household.

We all know about the sociological (or is it anthropological?) phenomenon of “teenagers,” and how this is a fairly modern development. Today, people don’t automatically become adults at age sixteen (or younger). They have so much more time to be kids. But for today’s mother, that boils down to more time to parent. To baby our babies, to cherish our children and to indulge our adolescents’ angst.

What a gift – this extra time. This option to forgo daily chores so that we can spend a few extra hours with our kids. Because for us that only means some clutter and mess – while for Pioneer Woman, it could have impacted the family’s survival.

And I’m not looking at this from a stay at home mom perspective either. Even when I was a working mom, I still had to do all the same housekeeping. So I really relied on my modern conveniences to give me even a modicum of time to devote to simply enjoying my children.

I think all mothers have at least one moment when they are struck by how different life is for us and how trivial some of our child rearing obsessions really are. The stress of preschool waiting lists and taking the perfect holiday card picture will lose some urgency when you consider the number of women who used to die in childbirth as compared to today’s statistics.

That was the big one for me. I was once talking about the number of friends I had (myself now included) who required either planned or emergency c-sections to save the life of the baby and/or mother. And I realized that there was a good chance that fifty percent of my friends would have been dead by age thirty.

At one time, Pioneer Woman got up before dawn to nurse an infant, gather eggs, milk cows, prepare a meal and wonder if her second missed period foretold the birth of yet another baby and all the risk that accompanies that miracle. It certainly puts my own complaints of sleep deprivation and stretch marks into perspective…

It’s so easy for me to get caught up in my own world of real and imagined problems, and I often call upon Pioneer Woman to give me that much needed perspective. She reminds me of the many things I take for granted: good doctors, baby monitors and time (albeit limited) to spend on myself. I can read, go out with friends, buy myself a little something because I had a hard day… I can actually worry about having too much to eat.

I look at my daughter and wonder what her life will be like. Will my own idea of modern ease put her much more advanced coveniences into proper perspective? Will she see me as an example for everything she takes for granted.

Of course it’s all relative. Someday, I’ll be another woman’s Pioneer Woman to be remembered. What will women fifty to one hundred years from now say about our current daily life? Only time will tell. But I do hope for their sake, someone comes up with a better system for dusting and vacuuming. Because no matter how much easier it is for us now with modern cleaning products and appliances – I’d rather be pulling taffy with my kids.

Until I’ve Walked a Mile in His Shoe…

My husband, Chris is finally coming to the realization that he’s not as handy around the house as he once made himself out to be. Every time something would go wrong with a small appliance or if a minor repair job materialized, he would scoff, “Oh I can do that – that’s simple to fix.”

But funny enough – those simple things never got fixed. Or more accurately, they stayed broken a long time until he finally admitted that he wasn’t going to get around to it and I should just call the plumber/repair man/contractor.

Sometimes he would attempt to fix something but lose steam after a trip to Home Depot to buy the necessary materials. My favorite example of this is “the rock.” A couple of years ago, he decided that we needed to fill the gaping hole that was starting to develop under our cement front steps. It began as somewhat of a crack that was there when we first bought the house in 2006, but after two years, it was getting noticeably wider. Apparently, this fell under the DIY label for Chris, and he said he would take care of it himself.

Knowing nothing about this kind of thing, I gave him my usual, “okay,” and promptly forgot about it altogether. A week or so later though, he came home with a big bag of cement claiming that he would get started on the project that very weekend. Unfortunately, it was rainy, so the bag of cement stayed out on our back deck. (You can see where I’m going with this…) And within a few short days it solidified into a completely unusable rock.

And of course, time passed and other priorities got in the way, and the bag of cement was largely ignored. But in Chris’ defense, it had become invisible as most of his unfinished projects (and dirty clothes on the floor and piles of papers on every surface and crumbs all over the kitchen counter…) are wont to do. So we lived with the solid bag of cement on our deck for a while.

One day I stubbed my toe on it though and went storming into the house to ask my husband what he planned to do with the boulder wrapped in paper that we had been pretending not to see for a year. He promised that he would remove it by the next trash day, but then the excuses started. It was really heavy and he’d need to borrow a dolly to transport it…he wasn’t sure if he could actually put it out with the trash since it was so heavy…he needed to find a dumpster where he could deposit it.

But after a while, I just couldn’t take it any longer (as I am wont to do) and decided that I would at the very least, get it off of my deck.

The first thing I did was try to drag it. But when I grabbed the end of the paper sack, it ripped right off. A fiber once strong enough to hold the amount of dry cement necessary to replace a significant portion of our front steps was now so degraded by the elements, that it hung as weightless as tissue paper in my outstretched hands.

For some reason this enraged me – the indisputable proof of the amount of time that bag sat around without anyone thinking to do something about it. And I became even more committed to my mission. I would get that rock off my property if it killed me.

Luckily, I didn’t have to die on principle. Instead I decided that the rectangular slab could probably be lifted end over end and slowly pseudo-rolled out the back gate. This process took some time, but I did it. And the rock was finally out of my life. Or at least, it was out of my line of sight. It now gathers moss in the grass outside our back fence.

This is just one tale in the epic story Chris’ attempts to be handy around the house. Some are minor, many are comical but few are ever seen through to completion. Which is why he has finally admitted that he is worthless when it comes to home projects. Whether it’s an issue of him not having the skill or not having the attention span – it’s just not worth it for him to bother trying. He’s always meant well, and they say that it’s the thought that counts…but after 10 years of unfinished projects, I beg to differ.

Which is why Chris recently enlisted the help of friend who moonlights as a contractor to replace our rotting back deck. And he had no problem acknowledging that he would be nothing more than a manual labor assistant performing simple tasks as instructed.

Unfortunately, in the process of one of the MOST simple tasks, unloading the lumber, Chris was injured. We’re not sure whether the wood was loaded incorrectly or if it just shifted during transport, but when they opened the back gate of the truck, it all came sliding out and landed directly on Chris’ foot.

Several hours, one ambulance ride, a few x-rays and 11 stitches later, we left the hospital and picked up a much needed prescription for pain killers. Chris would have to be on crutches for at least two weeks and while his foot wasn’t broken, it would take a long time for it to recover from that trauma.

OF COURSE, this all happened two weeks before a large annual conference that he personally runs. And when it came time to pack his bag, I found a great opportunity to crucify him for YEARS of DIY hubris. It occurred to me that he really didn’t need to bring any of his left shoes since his foot was far too swollen for anything sturdier than a tube sock. And I had a good long laugh about how he could pack twice as much footwear, conjured up images of a hopping Lowly Worm from the Richard Scarry books and made up shoe-related conversations we could have about his suitcase:

Kate: Are you sure your bag isn’t too heavy? Your shoes will add a lot of weight…

Chris: No – it should be fine. I’m going to wear my cowboy boot on the plane.

Now I realize that there are plenty of people out there without one of their feet who don’t wear a prosthesis and only require one shoe… But if I was going to be all PC about it, then I wouldn’t have the fun of rolling around on the floor laughing at his expense. And I’m kidding about rolling around on the floor of course. It was on the bed, as I don’t vacuum as often as I should.

I know I sound somewhat mean spirited, but you have to realize that I have rarely given him a hard time about anything like this. In fact, when we were in the emergency room, the doctor stitching up his foot alluded to the many times he “got in trouble” for attempting home projects instead of hiring someone who knew what they were doing. And it was like a lightning bolt hit me. I never even realized that was an option. I could actually be annoyed with him for being stupid. Amazing!

So if a little derision over his one shoe status is all he has had to put up with from me…well I think that’s fair enough. And I couldn’t seriously be mad about his refusal to give it up already all these years. Being the “man of the house,” is an iconic role that runs deep in the male half of the species. There is a good amount of pride tied up in protecting and providing for your family. And even if it ultimately mystifies me – I have to respect his daily struggle to live up to his own overly high expectations. I’ve always tried to see things from the other person’s point of view – so why would I deny that courtesy to my own husband? I figure it’s only fair to put myself in his shoe (omission of the “s” absolutely intentional) on this one.

The good news is that I don’t think we’ll be seeing many do it yourself construction projects in our future. We try to be glass half full people. To look for the silver lining and to learn from our mistakes. And as far as I’m concerned, the lesson here was loud and clear: people who wear flip flops while unloading lumber should hire professionals.