I’m feeling a little tapped out on confessions at the moment. Really – yesterday’s post included a couple. So I’m going to just to tell a quick, somewhat embarrassing story about myself.
I have always been a little…well, naive isn’t really the word…but something like that. Maybe innocent? Probably more like clueless. At any rate – I’m the last one to pick up on innuendo and I was a VERY good girl in high school. My experience with boys was pretty limited and I found out just how clueless I was when I got to college.
My first school (I transferred after first semester freshman year) was Eugene Lang, a small college in New York City that’s part of the New School. For the most part, no one I talk to has ever heard of it. One of the reasons that I chose it was that it’s affiliated with Parsons School of Design (where I had done a summer art program) so I knew that I’d be able to take classes there as well.
During all of the orientation hoopla, we received packets of information on the city, as well as the school, and some pamphlets that they thought would be of interest to us as new college students. One of these pamphlets was on safe sex. Now as innocent as I was, I certainly knew the basics and I wasn’t thrown by the condoms that were included. It was obvious what those were. But in actually skimming through the rest of the information, I came across products and terms that were completely unfamiliar.
There were two that stand out in my memory as being particularly mystifying. Since my new roommates were sitting with me going through their packets – I figured I’d ask them for further clarification. I’m not afraid to admit that I don’t know something about sex. Go ahead – laugh at me… Slut.
Anyway – the first question I had was “what is a dental dam.” Dental dams kept coming up in tandem with condoms and I couldn’t understand what teeth had to do with anything. I’m not going to bother including the explanation that I received, but if you have never heard of this product before (you never know), I’ve included a link. So that cleared things up. I had never really thought about safe sex from that perspective before – but of course the pamphlet featured pictures of different couples: boy/girl, boy/boy, girl/girl….so that was relevant.
The second thing that confused me was a third option for sex. As far as I knew there was regular intercourse (including the boy/boy alternative) and oral sex. But the pamphlet kept referring to “intercourse, oral sex and rimming.” I had never in my life heard the word “rimming.” I mean, none of my friends had mentioned it and I couldn’t think of anything that I had seen in a movie that implied something other than the first two…
Like I said – I’m not embarrassed to admit ignorance, so I asked, “what is rimming?” [Again – I’m not going to provide the exact answer I was given – but I’ve added a link for anyone that would like one.] The reaction I got ranged from snickers to incredulity. But they all knew what it was. And they told me. And my response? A horrified, “people DO that?!?”
I don’t think I’ll look at my key word searches for awhile… But I’m sure I’ll be getting a lot more hits from Thailand…
Wow! Quite an education you got at that first school!!! :-) I have to admit that I did not know what a “BJ” or a “hummer” was for a long time…and then when I figured out the “BJ”, I thought, “But you don’t blow…”
Anywho – my face is red. Time to go :-)
I was the same way when I got to college. Anything beyond the basics was totally foreign to me.
Again, wow!
I’m in my late thirties with two kids and I have NEVER heard of the first thing you meantioned and the second one I only have a vague understanding (and I don’t think I’m a prude by any standard). I won’t be clicking onthe links (as you might have guessed)but I can just imagine you googling those things!
I googled rimming and I found your site. I keep looking for the basketball pictures but I havent found any whats up? hee hee
LOL! You go Kate! Hopefully you’ll help out some teen wondering what the hell her friends were talking about. If we only had internet searches my teenage years may have not been so bizarre.
i love it! and I went to F.I.T. so I’m with you. When I tell people that they’re like fit? are you a personal trainer? haha…gotta love the midwest!
I’m with Anastasia. I hadn’t heard of the fist thing at all. I did click on the links, with fear and trepidation, and received clinical explanations.
I had never heard of rimming until just now. Thanks for the education. :-)
Although, I think I could have been happy not knowing that people actually do that. Yuck.
I didn’t know what a dental dam was until just now.
I wasn’t even aware that option existed…
I mean, I’ve probably heard the words, but I must have assumed it had something to do with old person sex. Old people have oral issues, I guess.
Well, thanks to Kate, the rimming possibilities are now wide open.
Ha! I know exactly where Eugene Lang is!
Your story is so endearing and adorable! and funny!
Just found your blog from another and thought I’d say hello!
I went to a small Catholic elementary school, and then went to the public school for grades 6-8. I remember having a friend explain what it meant when someone talked about going to second base, and so on…I was horrified at the thought of such things!
Wow! I just learned more from reading your blog than I did in my four years of highschool. I’m still a little confused as to what a dental damn actually is. I need a picture. Maybe I can find one on google…
good thing i was not your roommate because i would have been no help at all….
Tee hee hee! I loved this story. Also? This is the best post quote of the week:
Go ahead – laugh at me… Slut. Still giggling.
I think you should be proud of your naivete, especially since so many girls that age are way too “experienced.”
Uhhhh. . .
Just when I thought I could retire the phrase, “you learn something every day”. Now, I can add rimming to the list of words I know but will never use in public. I’m just glad a few others didn’t know either! I was the same, Catholic school all the way through and Good God what a shocker the real world was!
OMG Kate that is hysterical. Thanks for making me laugh– since I have a newborn I’m definitely more prone to crying these days. (ps – I have never heard of the first phrase, and I am NOT clicking on the link provided – I think ignorance is bliss) :)