You know those girls who are obsessed with horses when they’re young? They pretend jump ropes are reigns and run around the playground neighing and whinnying with their other horse-crazed friends? They inhale books on horses and collect plastic replicas to display on shelves?
I was NEVER one of those girls. I never took a riding lesson. I thought barns were stinky. When I looked at a particularly majestic specimen of equine beauty, I mainly focused on the huge teeth that could take off a finger or two. And possibly the flies buzzing around its rear end.
National Velvet? Never saw it. Black Beauty? Never read it.
I just never understood the the girls and horses thing.
This doesn’t mean that I dislike horses, of course. I just don’t really think about them.
I grew up in the city. I’m not much of an animal person. And this is totally fine with me.
But now – NOW – I have a daughter. And she IS one of those girls who is obsessed with horses.
Woe to the librarian who asks if she can help us… How could she know that a whip cracking pre-reader will have her searching the stacks for the infuriatingly few picture books featuring a horse on the cover. At least she doesn’t have to come home with us and sit with Eleanor as she goes through her check out pile, discussing each page in minute detail.
I’m just about as interested in this now as I was in third grade when my horse crazy best friend would make me learn terminology for horse anatomy and paraphernalia, and THEN quiz me on it. Hey – don’t judge. I was the new girl and thrilled that someone was actually talking to me. Whinnying across the playground with a jump rope around my waist was a small price to pay.
Back to Eleanor though… As much as I don’t share her fervor for equestrian life, I do feel a little sad for her. Because we live in horse farm HEAVEN and it would be easy to find a place for her to take riding lessons. She would LOVE it. And it’s never going to happen.
Yes – I’m aware that it’s not just a fun activity – it’s also wonderful exercise. In fact, it would be fabulous for all of my children. Especially Oliver. I know this because my old friend who force marched me through Horses 101 lessons in third grade is now a pediatric physical therapist in Hippotherapy (a practice of integrated intervention for various disabilities, utilizing “equine movement” in physical, occupational, and speech-language therapies). There are so many reasons for us to get our kids in to riding: easy accessibility, health benefits, fairy godmother-like wish granting for our daughter…
But it’s too expensive. Maybe if we only had one child. We have three, though. And we already spend more money than we have on therapies for Oliver.
I’m not poor mouthing or saying anyone should feel sorry for me. Nothing more than stating facts. Riding lessons just aren’t in the budget.
Luckily – Eleanor is still young enough to think that a pony ride is actual horseback riding. So I don’t think she’ll lament her lot in life with the non-equestrian family too much… And she IS only five. Next year, she could be into theater. Or soccer. Or Wicca. Whatever – as long as we can afford the associated fees, we’ll do the best we can for her.
Unless it’s Wicca. Didn’t I mention that I’m a city girl? I’m not driving her out to the woods to collect lichen and mouse skulls.
It’s one of the less fun aspects of responsible parenting…knowing when you have to draw the line.
I was the girl who whinnied across the playground with a jump rope around my waist, too! Hilarious post! Horses aren’t my thing either. They sense my discomfort with their hugeness, and my fear that no matter how far I clear the rear, I will get kicked by a bionic horse leg.
Great title, great story, and awesome photo! You made me smile and laugh this morning. Thank you. xo
VERY concerned that Barbie is riding her horse pants-less, much-less chaps-less! Just WHAT are you teaching Eleanor?! ;) Sounds like a great idea if you all take a vacation, do a horse ride with just her or all three. One time expense. Hopefully not a gateway drug…
Horses were never my thing either. Although I had friends who lived and breathed it. I’m terrified of the dang things. Hopefully it’s just a passing phase for Eleanor.
As you know, I was an equine lover! And, I mucked stalls in exchange for lessons, sometimes. I know! I have a great idea! YOU could muck stalls in exchange for lessons for Eleanor! Hahaha! (I crack myself up!)
Barbie needs some riding pants! I totally discouraged M’s early interest in horses. She is completely over it now and, thankfully, not yet a Wiccan.
“Unless it’s Wicca. Didn’t I mention that I’m a city girl? I’m not driving her out to the woods to collect lichen and mouse skulls.” No, I wouldn’t either. Maybe just to the edge of the woods. That made me laugh! The whole post did. Now, I will go share on FB!
Haha – Wicca! I’ve always loved horses and did take a few lessons as a girl though was never obsessed nor collected badges and trophies or anything like that. It is such an incredibly expensive hobby… hmmm, maybe you should consider wicca after all…?
OUCH! I mean… OUCH! Oh Barbie, the things you must endure!
Awesome post! My little sister got riding lessons. My parents just reminded me that I had terrible allergies and wouldn’t be able to be in the barns with all that hay. So I’d sit in the main office eating Fifth Avenue bars from the vending machine. I’m not bitter.
What a fun post. Eleanor sounds like such a sweetie :)
Wait: there’ve got to be city Wiccans. Maybe they mail order their lichen, but mouse skulls? Easy peasy in the big city, Kate. So sign her up for the Jr. Wiccan League. I think dues the first year are just discarded snake skin and pigeon feathers. (Real Wiccans: don’t hate. My comment reveals my ignorance of true Wiccanosity and isn’t intended as a slight.)
My family has a bunch of horse crazy people, my mom included. I am not one of them, either. They’re nice, but a LOT of work and I just don’t FEEL the consuming love that a horse requires. That said, it is nice to know that my nieces can ride to their hearts’ content and that (if I were to ever GO to the barn) my own kids could ride, too.
But I don’t encourage it because it requires a LOT of TIME!
Oh, Kate! You have no idea how I can relate to the whole horse-y scenario…I’ve always been the same way. Love this post and superb writing, as usual! xo
i hear ya! and i think those teeth can bite off more than a couple of fingers! :)
x
I can’t believe bare-assed ( as opposed to bare-back) Barbie got coverage on line and such a response! Poor Eleanor. Maybe in a couple of years she can get an after school job leading horses around a track like Sheridan used to do. Or maybe she will outgrow the obsession and go back to being a Ballerina. Still expensive but much more manageable. Whatever happens it will be the right thing.
Love you and as always love your writing.