I had a few different ideas for a post today, but all of them flew right out the window at about 7 a.m. At 7 a.m. I realized, for about the hundred -thousandth time that I am in fact the luckiest woman alive.
You see, I live in semi-squalor with a terminally messy husband and three toddler sized monsters in child costumes. These little demons don’t listen and they scream constantly and create mass destruction wherever they go. But it’s worse when they’re quiet because then we know that something really bad must be going on.
We’ve even given the kids little nicknames to match their evil alter egos. We call Oliver, George and Eleanor (respectively), Id, Chaos and The Brains.
We often speculate about about the white hairs appearing in my husband, Chris’ black hair. He’ll say, “I call this one ‘Oliver,’ and this one ‘George,’ and this one ‘Eleanor’…” And every once in a while, I’ll have my own namesake in there. VERY infrequently though.
Several times a week (or weekend to be honest), Chris will look at me in the middle of our daily anarchy and jokingly say that our lives just kind of suck right now. As in, “it will eventually get better – but for now, it’s a gaping abyss of suckiness.”
As much as I appreciate the humor, I have to beg to differ. We have three beautiful, healthy, larger than life children. This is what makes me the luckiest woman alive. Simply this. Because this is quite simply all that matters.
This morning at 7 a.m. I read that Heather and Mike Spohr, a couple that I have gotten to know through their blogs over the last year, lost their beautiful young daughter Madeline Alice, best known as Maddie. Maddie passed away on Tuesday, April 7, 2009.
How many times do I hear about a terrible tragedy involving a child?
Every day.
How many times does it make me count my blessings for the fact that my own children are at that moment alive and well?
Every single time.
But this is a little different, since this is a child whose face I know so well. It’s one that has made me laugh out loud and sigh with admiration. Maddie’s face is one that you don’t easily forget, so lit up with joy, laughter and wonder.
I can’t imagine what the Spohrs are going through right now. Or more accurately, I CAN imagine it and it scares the hell out of me. But more importantly, it puts everything into perspective.
I don’t care if my house is a mess or if I hate my job or if we have a kitchen the size of a postage stamp. How could any of that matter when right now at this very moment, all three of my children are safely tucked into their own beds with all of their blankets, pacifiers, books, Matchbox cars and stuffed animals. They may be curled up on their stomachs, little bottoms resting lightly on their crossed ankles. Or they may be sprawled on their backs with arms recklessly flung out with palms up – ready to grasp the morning that we all take so for granted each day…
This was a day that I took nothing for granted. And all day I carried Maddie’s sweet little face in my heart.
The Spohrs have asked that in lieu of flowers, donations be made to the March of Dimes in Maddie’s name:
My heart, so full of Maddie right now, goes out to Maddie’s parents, as well as everyone else whose life she touched.
There were many. And many more today. Including me.
So no honey, Our lives really don’t suck. We both know that this life we have right now is nothing short of miraculous. And every time we laughingly complain about it, we also count our blessings.
I can count at least three blessings. And their names are Oliver, George and Eleanor.
Today, mothers who read Maddie’s story felt sad, angry and grateful for today – this one more day with our children. We held them a little tighter. And we counted our blessings over and over and over…
Oh Kate, this is so terribly sad. I am so sorry about the Spohr’s great loss. Thanks for reminding me to count my blessings today– twice!
I have been thinking about them all day long and that video made me loose it. i wish there was something more that we could do.
I don’t even know them, but I was crying for this sweet little one and for her parents that are left feeling the emptiness. I went into my little guys room and just gave him a big kiss.
So much to be thankful for—thank you for sharing this post—it was really great—I will keep them in my prayers that they will somehow be comforted….
I feel so sorry for what everyone who knew her must be going through, especially her parents. I can’t even imagine their sorrow. She was such a beautiful and happy little girl.
I am so so sad for this family.
So very very sad. A big reminder to find the joy in every day and celebrate it. My heart goes out to all those who love Maddie.
Such a tragedy. I spent the entire day crying and playing extra hard with my kids.
Agreed – we are all so very lucky.
I’ve been reading about this loss many places. As parents, it’s our worst fear.
And yes, Maddie’s passing reminds me to hold my children, my husband… and count my blessings. My thoughts are with Spohr family.
Oh wow, I had no idea, what a sad story! Thank you for sharing, you are right we are all so lucky!
I just love little Maddie’s smile.
OMG, that is so sad. I can’t even imagine what they’re going through.
My heart goes out to them and their family.
I can not stop thinking about Maddie, and Heather and Mike. That little girl touched SO many people’s lives. People she never even met.
Your post was beautiful. Life is so precious.
All so true. It’s so horrible. I can’t stand it. I wish we could bring her back.
I have not read any blogs for a couple of weeks and am just catching up tonight. Thanks for posting this, I can’t imagine what this family is going through. I feel so grateful for my blessings!
I have prayed for that sweet family since Tuesday. What a terrible tragedy. This was a great tribute to Maddie.
Thanks for the post, it too made me count my blessings for my beautiful, healthy family. Just stopping by from SITS
Losing a child is so eternally hard.
That is so sad. My heart and prayers are with little Maddie’s family.
Much love from NJ,
Sue
xoxo
I’ve read about the Spohr’s tragedy on a few other blogs. I just can’t or don’t want to imagine. You are so right to remind us to count our blessings.
Exactly. I wish there was a way to make things not true. It just didn’t happen, start again.
You’re so right. Thank you for reminding all of us. Our hearts ache for Heather and Mike.