Just a sample of the ridiculous things I’ve heard myself say to my children recently:
Honey, be gentle with the inchworm…you’re scaring him.
You guys – DON’T hug the mannequins…
I love you too…can I have my head back now? No really honey, I can’t breath.
Don’t lick people!
[To a whining crying Eleanor in the car] Me: What’s wrong Eleanor, you don’t like Barry White? Eleanor: Nooo-hooo-hooo-hooo. Me: Well, that’s too bad sweetie [turning up the volume] because I looooove Barry White. [This was less ridiculous than it was mean – but honestly, WHO doesn’t like Barry White?!]
Oliver, honey, please stop kissing the mannequins.
Hey! Naked people stay inside! NAKED PEOPLE STAY INSIDE!
Oliver sweetie, what are you eating? Show me what you have in your mouth…okay, but just please tell me that it’s food.
George – do NOT spit that out. I want you to swallow. I mean it – you swallow. Don’t spit! Swallow!
Um…was your husband in the room for the last one. ;)
Naked people stay inside!
I've said this. Probably more times than I care to count.
Don't spit! Swallow!
OMG hilarious!
I need to start writing mine down!
M hates John Denver. His music makes her ears bleed!
This is all TOO funny.
I love "Naked people stay inside!" I made the mistake of making up with a song to encourage Ryan to get ready for his bath with the lyrics "You can't take a bath with your clothes on, you gotta get nude." Really? Where was my head? Now whenever we go by the pool, he sees guys in their swimtrunks and no shirts and points, exclaiming "Nudie!"
HA HA! Seriously hilarious. ;-) The naked one? So funny. And what is up with the mannequins?
HAHAHAHA. "Don't lick people" is sound advice for MOST of the population.
I now want to yell "Naked people stay inside" at the top of my lungs! hahaha – so funny Kate!
OMG, I'm dying over the last comment!! Good gracious. That's good stuff.
I LOVE BARRY WHITE! I would do the same thing. Oh Lord what a voice
Oh yeah, these are classics!
My latest is shouting "I'm releasing the beast!!"…as I let the 3 year old out of her crib every morning.
That's fantastic – just today I told Charlie – "please Charlie we don't put shoes in mouths"
Isn't that the difference between love and lust: whether you spit or swallow?
Your title says it all. At the end of the day when I think about the things that come out of my mouth, the boys' mouths… crazy! These are all FUNNY!
Don't hug the mannequins, don't kiss the mannequins, naked people stay inside, and don't spit! swallow!….yeah….I have said all of these things to my kids.
You're awesome!!