When we last left off from yesterday’s post (you may want to read that first – otherwise this might not make any sense), my early twenty-something friends and I were staring at older thirty-something women and thinking that we must have fallen into a time warp.
In the Fall of 1996 I was two years out of college and fully committed to my short skirts (skorts even!) and Jennifer Aniston shag.
On this particular night, we were helping my roommate with some envelope stuffing for the non-profit she directed. The non-profit was established by Georgetown University students, so there were a number of older alumni on the board of directors.
The four of us were sitting at a table looking like a low budget version of the cast of Friends. How full of ourselves we were – and how confident in our style. Although we had varying poor body image obsessions, we managed to mask them with well thought out wardrobe choices. And as any self respecting insecure young women should be, we were very aware of the appearance of others.
It was obvious when we arrived that we were the youngest ones there, and we joked about how we were banished to the “kids table” in the front room while the older group that had known each other for over a decade gathered around a larger table in the back room. Our position afforded us a perfect view of everyone as they entered the house. And what a parade of 1980-ugly that was! (That last line was from the point of view of an obnoxious 24 year old fashion snob of course.)
When each woman walked by, our “Rachels” would swish in unison as we tracked their progress to the back of the room. Every one of them sported trends that harkened back to Ally Sheedy’s St. Elmo’s Fire wardrobe of boxy blazers and drop waist floral dresses. And horror of horrors, most matched the color of their heels to their outfit! We could barely contain our giggles and finger pointing. Of course I’ve exaggerated a bit for effect…we didn’t ALL have that particular Rachel-inspired hairstyle. My friend Maureen preferred a shorter “Monica.”
I started to list some of the comments I remembered us making, but deleted them since they made us sound far meaner than we actually were. We felt comfortable in our cattiness among friends, but wouldn’t have wanted anyone else to hear us (such is the way with everyday derision…). Let’s just say that our conversation included the following words and labels: “feathered,” “Laura Ashley,” “yoke,” “Forenza,” “pumps,” “electric blue,” “fire engine red.”
After a fair amount of laughing down memory lane, Maureen astutely observed that we would be next. She said, “ten years from now, younger girls will be sitting here laughing at us with our flip hairstyles and clunky shoes.” While this honest image made us laugh louder than any of the snide quips did, it also made me think. It actually made me a little uncomfortable – and this had nothing to do with the body suit I was wearing. I just didn’t like the idea of being outdated.
And I still don’t. But starting with that minor observation from a friend, I had to recognize the fact that I would someday show traces of my own early style influences. And I would likely get stuck in my own fashion time warps. I would get busy with life and not notice that hair didn’t curl up anymore. I would continue to clomp around in my sturdy heeled pilgrim shoes while other women tippity tapped on pointier toes. While I couldn’t predict the future trends that would sweep past the stake I had so firmly driven into my claim for a 1996 identity, I began to feel the noose I had been fashioning for myself.
But knowledge is power right? And that evening, my friend inadvertently gave me some sage advice. You don’t really have to get stuck in a particular style era. And if you do, you can always pull yourself out of it. The first step is to open your eyes and realize that there is a lot of great style out there and not all of it conforms to what celebrities of the hour are wearing on screen. It’s perfectly fine to find a look that works for you – the trick is to make it translate into the current styles. This is where those 80s ladies went wrong. They didn’t update the styles that they liked – they just kept wearing the old version.
I’ve always preferred to learn from the mistakes of others. Seriously – let them do the dirty work. And I am happy to report that I am not in fact stuck in 1996. I’d say that I’m AT LEAST holding strong at a respectable 2006. So I’d like to thank those women who never gave up on their trusty green eyeliner or their tried and true Mia flats. And I’d also like to acknowledge any 80s die hards who stuck it out for another decade. If this is you – give yourself a pat on the back. Congratulations girls – the fickle fashion world is cyclical and you are now back in style!
i graduated in 86 and when i see all the things i used to wear start to come back into fashion, i feel OLD. big hair and tapered jeans are creeping back in. yikes!
I think I was born outdated, but the good thing about turning 40 is that I'm now comfortable enough in my own skin that I don't care as much.
aahh, i remember that night so clearly. it's not any fun being the "older" women in the room no matter how stylish we continue to be.
ha ha ha. Loved this. I remember when my sister got her Rachel haircut at Jose Eber in Beverly Hills. She rocked that do. I'm happy to say that she has moved on……but, it was fun while it lasted. :)
didn´t see it coming. i drive sara up a wall because i´m constantly telling her that what she wants to buy is too eighties… great post!
I agree!
I love mixing and developing 'my own style'-
yeah, that's what I call it ;)
xo
Great posts! I find it so interesting to watch certain aspects of different eras creeping back in. The new versions of old styles are always a little bit different unless you go totally vintage with it.
Ah, the Rachel. I sported that hairdo for a little while, then got over it and grew my hair out into a respectable bob. A couple of years later my hairdresser gave me a haircut that was reminiscent of the Rachel and it wasn't what I wanted. I thought, maybe I'm making too much out of this. Maybe it doesn't look like the Rachel. I was thinking all of this as I went and dropped by a friends place where a group of them were having dinner. I leaned in and whispered to the friend closest to me, "I'm worried that this looks too much like 'the Rachel'" to which she said, "Oh, hon. You know, I don't think that look stuck around long enough. It suits you." She said it with such sympathy and I was absolutely mortified. There. That's my rather long Rachel story.
I loved this. Part 1 and 2.
I loved this post. It's entertaining to see the Friends folks and to shake my head at the fashion that I so envied at the time.
Great post. Here's hoping shoulder pads and poofy curled bangs don't come back. Wider legged pants, yes please.
In the past few years I've become more aware of this myself! The fashion zeitgeist in which my own style influences are rooted (early-mid 90s grunge and goth of my teens) is so far out of fashion that in the past few years, I have found myself being forced to reexamine what it is about those things that I liked and wanted on my body, and what about those things needs to be shed so as NOT to become a walking fashion anachronism. Also, as that 92-94 moment is so far out of fashion now, I find myself reexamining the looks I grew up rejecting (the big hair and shoulderpads of the 80s, for example), and reconsidering how these elements of fashion might be incorporated into a look that still wants to be about delicate dresses and doc martens. It's an interesting process; I like to think that it's opened my horizons a bit, actually (though I absolutely draw the line at jeggings – NO!)
I'm particularly tickled at the resurgence of 90s fashion trends – the plaid, the ballerina-inspired floaty layers, the baggier boyfriend jeans that are popping up, the motorcycle boots, etc. – because not only do I see my own history and nostalgia in them, but I am so fascinated by what young and trendy folks are doing with them as they rediscover them! I've outgrown a lot of things now, and as my wardrobe is mercifully age-appropriate and current, I will likely watch this reinterpretation of the 90s from the sidelines. Still, I'm excited to see what they do with it! Teen vogue's grunge spread from a few months back was just the beginning – and I loved what they did!