…I was getting my hair done and obsessing over clouds.
I was trying not to let a smudged nail ruin my day and wondering whether it was really necessary to eat one of the sandwiches that people kept pushing at me.
I was assuming that Chris’ father would make sure that he did not show up with the outrageous amount of hair product that he unwittingly applied to his head the night prior.
I was talking to friends, family, photographers, florists, banquet staff, people, people, peoplepeoplepeople who kept dropping by my suite to check in, say hello, hug, kiss, request, inform, instruct – all about details that left my memory minutes after they occurred.
I was putting on a white dress and feeling like a bit of a princess – in that make believe-is-this-really-happening? kind of way.
I was trying to summon vast quantities of bubbly enthusiasm that I had never managed to hold onto for more than two minutes in my entire life.
I was walking down a terrace aisle (under an only slightly cloudy sky) smiling at people who had known and loved me anywhere from a few years to my whole life.
And I was marrying the man with whom I would spend the next ten years.
Before getting married, we made many plans. Some happened and some didn’t. We talked about having children – just not so late and so many and all at once. We knew what kind of life we wanted and what kind of parents we wanted to be. And all in all, I think we’ve done pretty well.
People tell you marriage is hard work. But you never know exactly what that means until you’ve done it. And it’s only when you’ve made a dent (like ten years?) that you can look back and realize that life is hard and having someone to help you though it is what marriage is really about. Not beautiful wedding albums and vacuum sealed white gowns. Not vague memories of an event – but solid experience in learning how to share your life.
Lately, I’ve often found myself saying “I just want to be happy – I want a peaceful life.” How boring this would have sounded to me ten years ago. But at some point, you realize that you never have to worry about life being interesting. Sometimes it can be just a little too interesting… Having someone to help suffer through the bad and appreciate the good gives you a constant – a safe port. It can save you over and over again.
I consider myself to be very lucky to have that. To have someone like Chris to share my life. And we’ve now been together ten years.
Ten years, and I still love him. And I still ask myself questions like…
Why so many razors??
That’s the other thing that marriage is about – maintaining a good sense of humor and seizing every opportunity to use it at your partner’s expense. (For more of that kind of thing, click HERE.)
EXACTLY what I needed to hear 24 days before my wedding. I hope to have the same feelings in 10 years. Congrats Kate and Chris!
I know babysitting never works out for us anymore, but I'd love to sit for you guys sometime after the wedding so you can go out and celebrate (a little late!).
Happy anniversary! We hit 15 years this year and it's a good feeling to still be happy where I am and with the way our life is going.
Here's to many more years for you guys.
Happy Anniversary! We had our 10th in July. I know what you mean about making a dent. We actually know of what we speak now. We say "I've got your back."
Enjoy!
Happy Anniversary!
LOL! So sweet and so funny. As you know, I love Brent to death. Our two year wedding anniversary is Monday. And yet, I still find myself asking questions like, "Why can't you just fold the towels the way I ask you to?"
It's one of life's great mysteries.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
Kate, I haven't stopped by in ages and am smacking myself! I'm on vacation (by myself – GASP)and decided I'd read and comment on the first thing in my reader and am so glad it was you. Wonderful post! Coming up on 24 years here (yes, I was a child bride and you've touched what is hard to explain with a great deal of wisdom :) Happy anniversary!
HAPPY HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!
So much has happened in those ten years – so much joy, some sadness, some losses, so much wisdom gained, and most of all a sustaining love and a beautiful wonderful family I love you all so much and wish more love, and more joy in the years to come.
Happy Anniversary to one of my favorite couples! Here's to another millenia of happiness, together!
Happy anniversary to you both! :D
We're just two years into this marriage adventure (but it *feels* like less than ten days and more than ten years, all at once).
Happy anniversary! What a great and TRUE post.
Happy Anniversary!
My wedding dress is sitting in a pile on my dresser….it got shoved into the bottom of a box when we moved and I don't know what to do with it.
What is up with those razors?
Ha! Why so many razors, indeed! This is a mystery I hope you'll share one day!
Happy anniversary to the both of you! This was a beautiful post.
Happy Anniversary.
Great, sweet post. Happy anniversary to you both. Please: a guest post explaining the razor thing? Now off to click and find out more of the promised funny stuff.
Oh my goodness, I'm back. I thought I as just going to read some "my wacky husband is so messy, he…" stuff and instead I get that incredible post. Thanks for linking back to it — what an hysterical and moving piece of writing.
Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!
"…that you can look back and realize that life is hard and having someone to help you though it is what marriage is really about."
One of the truest statements ever said. Nicely done, Kate.
oh kate….GREAT post! and soooo true!
it can be hard buuuut i think that you've done A GREAT JOB!!!
congrats :)
Happy anniversary and I wish you many more years of happiness.
Happy anniversary!
We hit 20 next summer and I honestly can't imagine where they've all gone. I don't feel old enough to be married to anyone for 20 years, but since I have been I'm sure glad it's been to him. I couldn't imagine going through life with anyone else.
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Happy Anniversary.
I definitely felt that way after ten years of marriage. It's work, but that's not a bad thing. (Life has had a way of surprising me, though.)
oh how much I wish I had that in my life! congrats to you both. I'm not going to give up the search.
Congratulations! Peace and happiness are good. The razors are hysterical.
Wonderful story Kate!! It is all in the details, or in not sweating them!
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Karena
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Congratulations on quite a milestone, Kate. I love what you wrote – so grounded and true. Have a great week. xo
Happy Anniversary!! We're coming up on our 10 year too.
Lovely post, Kate.
What a lovely post. I completely agree with what you say about not understand what marriage means until you're there making it work. Happy Anniversary!
I'm late, but HAPPY ANNIVERSARY! Keeping your sense of humor is really the only way you survive a marriage, in my humble opinion. And seriously, why does he have all those razors?
Happy happy belated anniversary! May you enjoy the next 10 as much as these.
Marriage IS hard work… but anything worth having is worth putting in the time and effort, no?
Happy happy!
Happy (belated) Anniversary, Kate. Happiness is all I want, too. Not always the easiest thing to get, though, sometimes. The simple things in life bring the most happiness. :)