Confessions of a Reluctant Housewife

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My house is always a bit of a disaster – mainly because my cleaning lady sucks. Most of the time, she barely finishes picking up clothes and toys before losing steam. Forget about actually scrubbing things. Oh sure, every once in a while the house gets a good cleaning and really sparkles – but very infrequently. She does stay on top of the dishes and the laundry, and she doesn’t let the bathrooms get out of control. But she just doesn’t have a consistent process. It’s all so haphazard. I’m honestly thinking about looking into bringing someone else in.

So I confess: I AM the WORST cleaning lady ever. I don’t know if it’s because I don’t have the time or if it’s because I have so little time that I don’t want to waste it on cleaning. I work five days a week, so I’m limited to evenings and weekends. And I feel like I should spend that time doing something far more meaningful like playing with my children or writing or watching Project Runway reruns. So I do the bare minimum – and it shows.

Ironically, I am somewhat fastidious by nature. I rarely leave clothes on the floor (unlike my husband) and I can be a little obsessive about the tasks I actually do complete. For example, my bed must be made a particular way. I like the covers to be tucked and straightened, and I have to smooth out any wrinkles on the matelassé coverlet. And of course the pillows must be neat and symmetrical. My husband has lived with me for nine years, and he has of yet to learn how to make the bed without me having to fix it. While he has definitely improved, his early attempts were akin to what I might expect my two year old twins to manage if they tried to do it. So yes – I can be a bit of a perfectionist.

Maybe that’s why I don’t like cleaning. Because I can’t just do something half way. Reorganizing a shoe holder might result in a complete closet overhaul. (It’s happened.) So instead I just put it off as long as possible. Another good example of this is vacuuming. My floors don’t even warrant the five second rule (more like the five nanosecond rule). I think I’ve written once before about how I caught myself saying to my son, “you can’t be naked – the floor is too dirty.”

The solution is either for me to get better at this or to make some sacrifices and hire a cleaning service. I’d like to say that I’m reluctant to pay for a service because I’m cheap or because I’m nervous about having strangers in the house. But that would be a lie. The truth is that I’m embarrassed to have professionals come in and see what kind of slobs actually live here.

Another Stakeout (but without Emilio Estevez)

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Like many other mothers, I experienced the first day of school yesterday. The only difference is that my son is three and this will be his second year going to full time school AND his second year taking the bus.

I wrote about our first experience with the bus a couple of months ago when I started my blog. Oliver did not love it at first – and I can’t blame him since I share his aversion to change (and it’s not like it was a little van or anything…it was a real school bus – the same one that older kids take). The transition wasn’t easy, but within a very short period of time, he LOOOVED the bus.

In spite of this I still worried that enough time would have elapsed for him to forget about how much he loved school and how much he loved “MY BUS.” So I decided that it would be best for me to head over to daycare that day and do a little surveillance from across the street.

If you read my post regarding my first stakeout, then you will understand why I wanted to be there to offer assistance as necessary. Oliver is a big boy (about 50 lbs. now) and the sweet older ladies that take care of him are used to the little pod person he becomes when he enters their domain. He follows directions and is apparently “a delight.” They have not had to wrestle him into submission (i.e. make him put on pants in the morning) and don’t have the experience or upper body strength required for this kind of activity.

Last year, Oliver planted himself on the ground (in a puddle) and refused to get on the bus. Gordana couldn’t hoist him off the ground and the bus driver said that they wouldn’t be able to take him in his soggy condition. I had to come get him and drive him to school myself. Gordana and I agreed that the following day, I would hide nearby and be ready to manhandle him onto the bus if it came to that.

It did (come to that) and I did (manhandle him). He would have to learn that the bus was a now fact of life with no opt out feature. And he did (learn). So we conquered the bus. And within a day or two, he was the happiest little boy riding a bus EVER.

Then summer vacation came. And I worried that he might forget about his beloved bus. That he would sense another change and take butt to pavement action yet again.

So I decided to have another stakeout. Which immediately brings to mind the Richard Dryfuss/Emilio Estevez sequal. Which reminds me of how Emilio was always my favorite brat packer. I loved him in St. Elmo’s Fire. Rob Lowe was just too much of a pretty boy and Judd Nelson had those enormous nostrils that I found incredibly distracting. And I always thought Andrew McCarthy was gay. Apparently he’s not – but I never understood his appeal… Then Emilio kind of faded away into movies that I never saw, making a brief comeback in Stakeout. I remember liking it but being perplexed by that awful mustache. I mean, were they trying to make him look like Richard Dreyfuss? I don’t get it… At least it was shaved off for Another Stakeout, which I also liked (because at the end of the day, I’m an easy audience).

But no Emilio – with or without bad facial hair – for this stakeout. I was on my own. And I was prepared to leap in and save the day. Just like a superhero. Just like last time.

And when the big moment came? It was a total non-event with Oliver dutifully trotting up to the bus and climbing up the stairs without prompting. I watched in a daze as he was whisked away to his second first day of school. Then I felt a little ridiculous for wasting the gas to drive over there. It was a bit of a let down after psyching myself up for a big display of mommy power.

But I did get one thing out of my stakeout (aside from fond memories of Emilio in his prime). I got to see Oliver – my big boy – off on his first day back at school. Even if it was from afar.

I won’t be the mom who waits with the school bus this year. I won’t be the one to greet him when he returns and give him a hug and a snack. I won’t be able to ask him about his day until an hour or two later when I pick him up after work. I may eventually be able to do those things. (who knows what direction my career may take). It just won’t be this year.

But I do have that image to replay in my mind every day at the time the bus is scheduled to arrive. My Oliver – walking to the bus on his own – with his back to school haircut and his Superman backpack. I’m so proud of him.

The Results Are In!

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Thank you to everyone that bid on my auctions! I am in awe of the generosity (or at least love of stuff) that I’ve seen all over the internet this past weekend.

My auctions ended tonight, and here are the final results:

Pinecone Hill Robes – go to jjsmith for $75 AND to Mama Ginger Tree for $100

Arden B coat – goes to Cat+Tadd for $95

Little Girl Necklace #1 – goes to Robyn for $25

Little Girl Necklace #2 – goes to Jessica for $20

Claire V. Bag #1 – goes to myimaginaryblog for $60

Claire V. Bag #2 – goes to karetaking for $55

Women’s Pendant Necklace #1 – goes to LBThompson for $60

Women’s Pendant Necklace #2 – goes to Sara for $35

Women’s Pendant Necklace #3 – goes to Tracy for $25

Total raised: $550

Many of the bidders didn’t include an e-mail address in their bid. If you did not provide me with contact information (please go back and check), then just e-mail me at bigpieceofcake@gmail.com with an e-mail or phone number where you can be reached.

Thank you again for your support of this auction – really your support of ALL of the auctions. And of course everyone should go immediately to DesignMom.com and tell Gabrielle Blair that her heart is as beautiful as her lovely website. She is an inspiration and a true friend. Without her vision and coordination, none of this would have been possible.

Nie Nie Silent Auction Update

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It’s not too late to bid! My auctions will stay open until Monday, September 1 at 10 p.m. EST. Here are the highest bids so far:

Pinecone Hill Robe – $70

Arden B Coat – $70

Little Girl Necklaces – $20 & $7

Claire V. Bags – $55 & $45

Women’s Pendant Necklaces – $50, $30 & $25

So that’s $372 for Nie Nie! I think…Math is not my strong suit – and it’s late… But it’s still a lot of money to add to the fund. Let’s go for $400 – OR $500! Apparently I’m very ambitious when it comes to other people’s money.

Thank you again to all of you supporting these auctions!

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction Reminder and Brief Confession

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Since I do not want my auctions to get lost under one of my typically long (yes – I KNOW they are long) posts, I’m not going to post again before the Monday, September 1 cut off at 10 p.m.

If this is the first you’ve heard of Nie Nie Day, you can read my post from Thursday to get further details on the Nielson family and all of the amazing auctions that are going on right now (there are over 300). Big thanks to Gabrielle Blair of DesignMom.com for organizing this!

And here is my “Friday Confession” for this week. This morning I had ice cream for breakfast. The end.

I told you I was keeping it brief. Look for a post about the auction winners on Tuesday morning. Have a great holiday weekend!

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction: Pinecone Hill Robe

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I’m excited to announce that I’ve just added a FIFTH item to today’s Nie Nie Day silent auction. Jo and Terry Coveny (my parents) of Style Key West, are donating a beautiful “Genevieve” cotton robe from Pinecone Hill:


(Online details: 100% cotton, two loops on waist with tie belt.)

To view a better picture online, click here. The Genevieve robe that is being auctioned off is in peony pink (pictured at center) and is available in both sizes: small/medium and large/x-large.

Pinecone Hill loungewear is truly luxurious, and I am lucky to have received several items as gifts (one of the perks of having family in retail!) This would make a fabulous gift for someone you love (or even for yourself!)

Please place your bid in the comments section along with an e-mail address or phone number where you can be reached.

The auction will be closed at 10 p.m. EST on Monday, September 1, and the winners will be announced the following morning. Winners will make their payments to a PayPal account for the Stephanie Nielson Fund.

Don’t forget to check out the other items that I am auctioning off (there are FIVE posts in all) and visit www.designmom.com and www.allmediocre.com for lists of other participating websites.

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction: Arden B. Coat

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The fourth item (of five) for today’s Nie Nie Day silent auction is a gorgeous black coat from Arden B (yes – I know – I said BCBG – I was wrong).
As you can see, our lovely model Kate is posing outside of her house with two half dressed toddlers trying to get out the door. And note how the green garden hose that is unraveling next to the stairs is so perfectly framed by her arm and torso. Yes – it’s all terribly glamorous.



(Label details: Size Small, Shell – 75% cotton, 25% polyester, Lining – 65% acetate, 32% viscose, dry clean only.)

I’m sorry that I don’t have better pictures. I planned to do one full length shot, one of the back and one of the waistline (this coat has a beautiful silhouette). But the picture was taken by my husband (who is a terrible photographer) with our digital camera (which is mediocre at best), two minutes after he got home, two minutes before a rain storm and two seconds before the camera battery died. That first picture is the only one he was able to take.

But as you can see, I have also included a picture of the label (the clothing tag was ripped off of the little plastic thingy before I purchased it – but the original price was over $200). I think I got it on super sale for $90. I have also included a close up of the pocket so you can see the beautiful textured fabric. The coat is light enough for chilly autumn, but warm enough for dressy winter.

And why am I not keeping this coat for myself? Because I can’t wear it. I’ve never worn it. It has never been worn.

I bought it when I was hugely pregnant with my son, Oliver. I hadn’t purchased anything for myself that didn’t have an expandable front panel in months and I think I kind of lost my mind for the few minutes it took me to carry the coat to the register and agree to buy it even though all clearance sales were final. I thought at the very least it would be incentive for me to lose the baby weight.

Well I did lose the baby weight – twice. And two years later, at the skinniest I’ll ever be again in my life, it still didn’t fit. My hips are simply too wide for this coat (I have the coveted “pear shaped” figure).

You may be wondering how it is that I’m modeling it if it doesn’t fit. Well – in truth it does fit. As long as I don’t wear a stitch of clothing underneath it. And this doesn’t seem very practical for a cold weather coat…unless I decided to become a flasher… So I’ve decided to donate my beautiful coat to a good cause. Hopefully another non-pear shaped woman who wears size small will be able to enjoy it when the temperatures drop in a few months.

Please place your bid in the comments section along with an e-mail address or phone number where you can be reached.

The auction will be closed at 10 p.m. EST on Monday, September 1, and the winners will be announced the following morning. Winners will make their payments to a PayPal account for the Stephanie Nielson Fund.

Don’t forget to check out the other items that I am auctioning off (there are five posts in all) and visit www.designmom.com and www.allmediocre.com for lists of other participating websites.

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction: Little Girl Necklace

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The third item (of five) for today’s Nie Nie Day silent auction is your choice of two adorable necklaces for little girls (or little boys – your call).

The world famous Parker (my cute as a button neighbor), agreed to be my model. While these pictures provide the general look of each necklace – my lack of experience as a photographer shows. So each picture of Parker is followed by one that provides better detail:

Choice Number 1

Blue Quartz Flower on a Sterling Silver Chain with Sterling Silver Clasp (this also comes in pale blue on silver and red on gold plated silver)

Choice Number 2

Red and Green Indian Beaded Pendant on a red silk cord with with Sterling Silver Clasp (this also comes in black and navy)

(I wanted to feature two other styles – but then remembered that Blogger limits the number of pictures I can use. Although it doesn’t seem like other bloggers have this problem… Anyway – if you are interested, e-mail me and I’ll forward you pictures.)

These necklaces typically retail for $15-20 in stores. They were designed and donated by Christy Wood Jewelry Design. Christy currently has only a few women’s items listed in her online shop (she is in the middle of setting up a new one), but she can do custom work as well as send photos of current designs based on your preferences. She can be contacted via e-mail at christy.wood@netzero.com.

Please place your bid in the comments section along with an e-mail address or phone number where you can be reached.

The auction will be closed at 10 p.m. EST on Monday, September 1, and the winners will be announced the following morning. Winners will make their payments to a PayPal account for the Stephanie Nielson Fund.

Don’t forget to check out the other items that I am auctioning off (there are five posts in all) and visit www.designmom.com and www.allmediocre.com for lists of other participating websites.

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction: Claire V. Silk Bags

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The second item (of five) for today’s Nie Nie Day silent auction is your choice of two lovely handmade silk bags from Claire V.:

Choice Number 1

The Lauren Tote is 8″ Long x 7.75″ High x 5.5″ Deep. This one comes in glacier/mocha (with mocha lining) and has a zip closure with two additional inside compartments.

Choice Number 2

A slightly dressier style, the Abigail bag featured comes in black/silver. It is 7.5″ High x 13″ Long x 3.5″ Deep. It has a snap closure with two additional inside compartments.

(I wish I had taken better pictures in natural light…but the time got away from me. If you are really interested but want more pictures of detail, e-mail me and I’ll try to get some better shots.)

These bags typically retail for $67-87 in stores. All Claire V. bags are handmade by women in Cambodia who are paid a fair wage and given comfortable working conditions. These women would otherwise be working in sweatshops (or worse). Many of the bags are crafted in training centers for landmine victims in Cambodia. A portion of the company’s proceeds are donated to education and health initiatives for women and children in Southeast Asia.

The two bags featured in this auction are donated by ME. I sell them – so if you are ever interested in buying one that you see on their website – contact me first (I charge less – and depending on your order size, I pay for your shipping).

Please place your bid in the comments section along with an e-mail address or phone number where you can be reached.

The auction will be closed at 10 p.m. EST on Monday, September 1, and the winners will be announced the following morning. Winners will make their payments to a PayPal account for the Stephanie Nielson Fund.

Don’t forget to check out the other items that I am auctioning off (there are five posts in all) and visit www.designmom.com and www.allmediocre.com for lists of other participating websites.

Nie Nie Day Silent Auction: Pendant Necklace

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The first item (of five) for today’s Nie Nie Day silent auction is your choice of three beautiful pendant necklaces (I have one in pink quartz and I LOVE IT – I can inquire about the availability of other colors if you would like):

Choice Number 1

Lavender Colored Light Amethyst drop with Light Amethyst Swarovski Crystals on a Sterling Silver Chain with Sterling Silver Clasp

Choice Number 2

Pale Blue Chalcedony Drop with Blue-Gray Swarovski Crystals on a Sterling Silver Chain with Sterling Silver Clasp
Choice Number 3

Yellow Citrine Drop with Topaz Swarovski Crystal on a Gold Plated Sterling Silver Chain with Gold Plated Sterling Silver Clasp

(Sorry about the lack of a close up on #3 – Blogger would only allow 5 pictures.
The winner can request another view if they would like to see one.)

These pendants typically retail for $50 in stores. They were designed and donated by Christy Wood Jewelry Design. Christy currently has only a few items listed in her online shop (she is in the middle of setting up a new one), but she can do custom work as well as send photos of current designs based on your preferences. She can be contacted via e-mail at christy.wood@netzero.com.

Please place your bid in the comments section along with an e-mail address or phone number where you can be reached.

The auction will be closed at 10 p.m. EST on Monday, September 1, and the winners will be announced the following morning. Winners will make their payments to a PayPal account for the Stephanie Nielson Fund.

Don’t forget to check out the other items that I am auctioning off (there are four posts in all) and visit www.designmom.com and www.allmediocre.com for lists of other participating websites.