What Would We Do Baby, Without Us

Ever get a song stuck in your head and you have no idea where it came from? For me it’s currently the theme song from Family Ties (remember that one – it ends “sha-la-la-la”). Well it’s sort of driving me nuts, but it’s definitely fitting for my thoughts today.

I have a wonderful husband named Chris. We have been married for close to eight years now. And while you might not guess it to look at him – he is a slob. And he’s not just an ordinary, run of the mill messy slob who doesn’t care about his messiness. He’s a creative slob.

He doesn’t just leave things where they fall, he creates odd piles and organizational systems. It isn’t possible for him to see a clean surface area and not immediately add clutter to it. And god forbid I move the items. Then it’s all, “where did you put my DMV renewal form? I know I was keeping it in the pile under the dining room table.”

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen him notice a balled up dirty sock on the floor and purposefully kick it into the corner NEXT TO THE HAMPER (“Back in the corner you go. There! Much better.“) Though I honestly think the clothes on the floor are invisible to him. He’ll walk around them for days until he sees something he wants. Then that item alone escapes the cloak of invisibility and magically appears out of nowhere! He gets very excited about this.

Unfortunately for me, the hamper is always invisible.

He also keeps things long past their expiration date. Like the pleated front pants that he never wears, or the shoes with holes so big, hobos would throw them out. One of my greatest moments of satisfaction was pointing out that there would never again be an appropriate time to wear his fraternity “a day without a buzz is a day that never wuzz” tee shirt with its visual of Calvin and Hobbes passed out around a keg.

But I think one of my favorite memories of the organized mess was one that happened shortly after we were first married. We lived in a one bedroom rented apartment with a large living room/dining room area. When you entered the apartment, the coat closet was to your right, the living room furniture was directly in front of you and the dining room table was on the far left end of the room. And our wedding was in the Fall, so within a month, it was time to pull out the coats and jackets.

Every day when he went out, Chris would take a coat out of the closet. And every day when he came back, he walked across the apartment and hung that coat on one of the six dining room chairs. I didn’t notice this immediately, but when I had the urge to start putting coats away, I recognized the pattern taking place and decided to see how it played out (I also marveled at how many coats he had).

Finally the seventh day came, and I stood expectantly, watching him walk in and take off his coat. Surely he would see that the chairs were all taken and realize what he was doing. I saw his look of surprise as the dilemma presented itself (“Huh. It seems that all of the chairs are already in use, there are none left.“) and then I saw him look around and consider his options (“Are there any other places I can put this coat?“). AND THEN I saw him carefully fold his coat in half and drape it across a clear area on THE FLOOR! That was when I had to scream, “stop the madness!” Apparently, the problem was that in the evening, our coat closet, much like our hamper, was invisible.

Don’t believe me? Here are a few pictures I took on Friday to document this:

Ever wonder what you should do with those twist ties that hold the dry cleaning hangers together?

Well if you are an ordinary slob, you will drop them on the floor – but if you are truly pathological, you will find a handy hook on the closet wall and wrap it around that. Sweet – and what do you know, it’s now invisible.

Since you ask – yes, that IS a hanging shoe organizer behind the hook. It must have confused you since it doesn’t actually hold shoes. And where do we keep those?

Here they are – in their proper jumble on the closet floor, along with a few random articles of clothing and the plastic dry cleaning bag that must have accompanied the now invisible twist tie.

Okay – here is one more bonus picture.

So where do you keep YOUR plastic bags after you unload the groceries?

Really? That makes sense, but I think our spot under a dining room chair is better.

Yes – Chris is a true original in his slob style. But he’s also unmatched in his ability to take care of his family. Shortly after I came up with some ideas for this post and took those pictures, we found out that my mother’s cancer has returned. This time, it is in her brain.

Chris found out on Saturday before I knew, and while I was sleeping that night, he booked my ticket to Key West for the following Monday. He stayed up all night worrying and talking to his family on the West Coast. And after very little sleep, he got up and spent the entire day doing everything he could to keep the kids busy while I ran errands and packed.

And when I felt like I might go out of my mind at the idea of being away from my children for a whole week, he booked a ticket for my three year old to come with me.

And when I felt like I was being weak, he pointed out that it would be a wonderful surprise for my father, to whom Oliver is very close (especially since it’s my Dad’s birthday). /

And I think he asked me if I was okay about a 100 times today.

And I’m really, really going to miss him this week.

I’ve never been one for public schmoopiness – but I really am lucky to have this man in my life. What would I do without him? Without us? Sha-la-la-la.

Originally posted on June 29, 2008. I thought this was fitting since September is our anniversary month – NINE YEARS on September 16! Visit Scary Mommy for links to more Flashback Friday Posts!

ScaryMommy

Have You Ever Wanted to be a Paper Doll?

Attention fashionistas! Merge your home fashion shows with some childhood nostalgia. Claudine Helmuth is now offering Custom Magentic Paper Dolls.


For $25 you’ll get a custom magnetic doll with your photo image plus a set of outfits in a reusable gift tin. If you would like additional custom outfits or elements created, she can do that for $15 per item. Maybe some ruby slippers for a Wizard of Oz fan, or a wedding dress for a bride to be?

I’ll take the blue vintage fridge too please!

Click HERE to see examples of: Baby, Small Child, Child/Pre-teen and Adult/Teen.

I think these are perfect for hostess gifts, stocking stuffers or maybe even just a little something for yourself. Adorable.

Put that on my list please, Santa.

When a Photographer Becomes a Doll Maker

I think I’ve made it pretty clear that I have a thing for dolls. And I’ve definitely featured the amazing work of Christine Alvarado from Du Buh Du Designs before.

One of the things that makes her site so spellbinding is that she features her handmade dolls in the most beautiful images.








I never really gave much thought to who was taking these gorgeous pictures, but apparently it was HER. Though I should have guessed this since the personal pictures she has on her blog are quite lovely too.

The last blog post I read on Du Buh Du announced that the always empty Etsy shop (her dolls disappear seconds after she lists them) will now include prints of several of her doll photographs. Here are a couple:




You can see the rest HERE. Which one is your favorite?

When Exactly Did Ovarian Cancer Become Funny?

Well…never. But you COULD watch this very funny video by everyone’s favorite (or at least my favorite) humor blogger, Jessica Bern of Bern This fame.

If you register, Seventh Generation will donate a dollar to Ovarian Cancer Research. So make sure to register HERE after watching the video.

I think that we all know someone who has battled (or is battling) some form of cancer. While this may not be the particular cancer you want to tear apart and stuff into the closest incinerator – all cancer research brings us that much closer to the ever elusive cure.

So laugh for cancer research. It’s the most pleasant donation you’ll ever have to make.

Ten Wishes Tuesday (September 1, 2009)

(click image for source – which is actually my incredibly talented brother’s portfolio site!)

Today’s ten:

Any suggestions for my list? If I don’t already have it, I’ll add it!

Want to see the rest? Click the Ten Wishes Tuesday tag below.

Pre-September Post: The R Rated One

I was thinking that I had to post something today since I was gone for a week, but then I realized that it’s not September until tomorrow. And my parting words were, “see you in September.” BUT I already had an idea for a quick post and I may as well do it. Plus – I need a Monday’s Muse post.

So here is my muse for this week: TMI from my daughter AND family nudity. I know – not really a muse…but I haven’t had much time to think about it.

As you may have known, we just drove down to Florida to visit some of Chris’ family and ended up at his Uncle’s beach house in Long Boat Key (outside of Sarasota). On the way, we visited some barbecue places for Chris (he just loves his pulled pork), and captured some of it on film (disc? memory chip?) for his food blog. He’s been posting these little vlogs all of last week – some about the food, but most just bits and pieces of us at the beach and pool.

You can see all of them HERE – but the one he put up yesterday was a little shocking. Before I get to that though, I’d like to announce that my daughter is far worse than her brothers when it comes to the potty talk. She absolutely delights in telling you she farted and nearly dies of ecstasy when she can point out that someone else did. Seriously – if I shift the wrong way on a leather chair, she’ll scream, “mommy FURTED!” I’m just waiting for her to do this to one of us in public…

She is also all about what’s going on under the diapers, and has been proudly pointing out her business (which she calls her “kiki” – something she must have picked up at daycare) for a few months now. Just I’ve been waiting for her to start talking about her brothers’ business…

Well – that finally happened today. And all morning I’ve been answering the same questions about the boy’s anatomy:

Eleanor: Mommy – does Oliver have a PEE-NAHS?

Me: Yes. Because Oliver is a boy.

Eleanor: Mommy – does George have a PEE-NAHS?

Me: Yes. Because George is a boy.

Eleanor: Mommy – does Oliver have a PEE-NAHS?

And on and on and on. Another conversation I’m not looking to coming up in public. I’m sure it will be something like, “Mommy – you FURTED! And George has a PEE-NAHS!”

But enough about furting and pee-nahses. Want to see something really shocking? Visit Chris’ blog HERE to see some nudity.

Don’t forget to grab a button and add your Monday’s Muse link over at Cinnamon & Honey every Monday!

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Polarn O. Pyret: A Giveaway and Some Boring Home Movies of My Kids

I had to move this over from my other blog, The Big Piece of Cake. I’m not always the best at reading the fine print, and apparently giveaways above a certain price point are a no no for my BlogHer ads contract.

So until I can figure out some kind solution for this (another site for giveaways maybe?), Wishing True will be hosting this one. Have you entered yet? You can do so on the original post or here in comments.

From The Big Piece of Cake, Tuesday, August 18:

Polarn O. Pyret: A Giveaway and Some Boring Home Movies of My Kids

Well – I don’t think they’re boring. But I didn’t want to build them up too much. Professional filmmaker, I’m not.

The reason that I’m even including the footage is that it displays examples of the product that I’m giving away this month.

A while ago, my friend Linda (of Baby Bunching fame), agreed to let me do a giveaway for one of her P.R. clients, Polarn O. Pyret.

Polarn O. Pyret is a children’s wear brand from Sweden. The clothes are very simple and stylish and have a retro look to them. They’re also often unisex, which is great for hand me downs to siblings and family friends.

While I initially asked about a giveaway, Linda suggested that I do a product review as well.

Long product reviews are boring – so I’ll be brief. The shirts that she sent me were super cute and comfortable (as far as I could tell I mean…I assume they were since the kids weren’t screaming and trying to rip them off – don’t laugh, it’s happened).

They were also roomy, which was nice since European clothes in ladies’ sizes tend to lean in the opposite direction. There’s nothing more annoying than ordering clothes for your kids and then finding that they may last a month before landing in the donate pile.

Finally, they wear really well, even after multiple washings. I can attest to this since I had George and Eleanor in those shirts every other day in hopes of getting just ONE good picture for my review. Unfortunately – this proved to be impossible, but I did find that you can wash them 10 times in one week and they’ll still look brand new!

You can visit the website to see the full style catalog, but here is what I’ll be giving away: an outfit to include a shirt, pants and socks in one of three styles, rabbit, sheep or duck (for sizes 2 through 6)

Here are pictures of the rabbit style:




In lieu of photo shoot I had planned, in which my children would model the clothing, here are some impromptu home movies featuring poor lighting, sea sickness-inducing angles and lame voice overs (Eleanor is modeling the rabbit and George is modeling the sheep):

 

I know…Eleanor’s hair… I’m lucky if she lets me brush it, let alone use a barrette. And while it wasn’t clear in what I said (what am I drunk?), Oliver is NOT wearing a Polarn O. Pyret shirt. The one that was sent for him didn’t fit. He’s rather…husky. So he’s wearing one of his own Target t-shirts.

Here’s my second try:

Go ahead – play in the street. Just let me get a good shot of that damn shirt!

Our next stop was Best Buy and I HAD to include these clips since they are so indicative of what it’s like to take all three of my kids anywhere. Eleanor is not in the frame because she’s behind me screaming about how the music is too loud. I guess she’ll never be a groupie. I’m devastated.

Once the gymnastics start – it’s time to leave.

Finally, I felt I really must include something on Oliver in his shirt. Not only was it a tad…snug, it featured horizontal stripes! He looks like a candy mated with a sausage:

But he sure is cute.

And now that you’ve suffered through all of that (or scrolled down to the bottom – whatever), here are details on how to win!

Leave me a comment telling me which style you would choose. For an additional entry, go to the Polarn O. Pyret site and tell me what you like (other than the styles I’ve featured please).

And of course you get an extra entries for anything you do to promote the giveaway. E-mail friends, tweet, share in your reader…just let me know.

As usual, I’d appreciate it if you’d leave a separate comment for each entry. So much easier to tally.

I’m going to be away next week, so I’ll keep this open through Labor Day. Good luck!

And thank you Polarn O. Pyret for the adorable shirts!

ArtQuiver

I can’t remember where I found this… Feel free to let me know if it was you and I’ll give you credit.

ArtQuiver is an online gallery featuring (in their words) “original, one-of-a-kind paintings from a hand-selected group of US based artists. Individually chosen for their unique combination of skill, style, and value, we represent a wide range of artists, from the emerging to the established.”

They also have a super cool search feature that quizzes you on your preferences and then makes recommendations for what you would like.

It’s quick and fun – check it out!

Here are some pieces that were selected for me that I really liked (including some not selected but by the same artists):










There were others that didn’t really strike me – but nothing I hated. I wouldn’t say it was 100% accurate – but pretty darn close.

Give it a try and let me know what you think.

Gone Fishing – Again

We’re out of town again. This time to Florida – a last minute trip to see a sick family member. AND we’re driving, god help us… But we’re making some stops and will be at the beach most of the time. So it will actually be a “fun” family vacation.

We left on Friday, and I’m taking a real blog hiatus this week (although Chris will be posting some footage of our trip on his site). I’m not even READING blogs (not just a break from writing/commenting). I’ll probably have to just mark everything in my reader as “read” when I return. I hate missing anything though – so if you had a really great post or made any huge announcements involving a sex change, a felony or a new pet (or all three!), let me know in comments or via e-mail.

ALSO – I’ve noticed that it’s kind of a virtual ghost town right now. Which I guess is to be expected since it’s prime vacation/back to school prep time. SO I’m keeping my giveaway open through Labor Day. Don’t want anyone to miss it. Don’t forget to leave me a comment to enter.

See you in September!

Feeling Weddingish: High Society Swoon

I find some of the most beautiful images on Wedding Cabaret. No idea where I found this site, but Mara really does discover some lovely weddings to feature.

I’m particularly taken with this bride. I think she looks like a Vanderbilt.


From the diamond pin accents on her stunning dress to that to die for headpiece, I can’t tear my eyes off of her. I think I want to marry her myself.


I also think she looks like a cross between Angelica Houston and Kristin Davis (à la S&TC days).

This bouquet is one of the most beautiful arrangements I’ve ever seen.


And the details are impeccable. I’d also kill for a a black and white cookie right now…